Saturday, August 29, 2015

Hey everyone~

Sorry for the long absence, but I've had a lot going on and a lot on my mind as of late. You see, something happened to me a few weeks back that made me question everything I've had planned and all my priorities. I thought I had become pregnant~ & for that first week, I was so happy & thrilled I was literally on Cloud 9. So high up was my heart, mind, & soul that I refused to believe it when the take home tests kept telling me I wasn't... until the irrefutable truth finally set in and made itself known. Learning that I was NOT pregnant was probably the most heart wrenching thing I've experienced in a long time. I cried my heart out- But it made me realize something...

It made me realize that I want to have a child more than anything else in this universe. Far more than anything else I have thus far wished to have. I've always longed to have a child and I've spoken of it often. However, I have always been waiting & waiting for the right guy to come along.. and now I've waited 16 YEARS & yet Mr. Right still eludes me. I just keep getting older and older... and life's not going to wait forever- Eventually, it'll be too late to have a child and I've come to see that being told that I can't have a child is probably my #1 greatest fear. So.. despite the disappointment I've had to endure the past week.. I'm glad it all happened, because it made me rethink things & realize that I need to reorganize my priorities at bit.

It doesn't affect my overall plan at all- ;) I still plan to retire at 40 and set sail around the world on the D.S. Sunny Freedom that I have yet to build. I will still do everything I can to make the world a better place for all those around me. I will also still go on my backpacking trip across the country. I am still going to have a child before I turn 35. The only thing it's changing is the order in which I wish to accomplish all these things~

Thinking about things realistically & logically.. I'm probably in the absolute BEST position to have my child NOW. I've got a wonderful job which pays well and has excellent health benefits. I'm settled in a quaint little town that is perfectly safe for small children to grow up in. There's even a daycare center that just opened up down the street from my place. I've even found a brand new art co-op just the other day that is willing to sell my art on commission. Things are going extremely well for me right now and I've even been able to save up a decent amount of money for my future ship in the form of a 401k through work. If I stay on with the FPS for 4 more years, I'll be a vested employee and earn even more benefits towards my early retirement. So if I'm looking to raise a child, I'm in the best position NOW to do so!

If I were to go ahead with my previous plan of resigning in 6-8 months to do my backpacking trip.. there would be absolutely no guarantee that I'd be able to find such a nice job again; much less find one quickly. I'd be putting not only my health & my child's health at risk, but I'd be putting all of my future plans at risk by going off somewhere else, only to find that I can't find a decent job or can only find a job without the nice benefits. I may not be able to afford to have my child and still save up for everything I desire to accomplish. If I stay here, I'll have no problems in doing so- Also, if I were to have my child now, my child would be 8 or 9 years old when I set sail instead of only 4 or 5.. & frankly? The older my child is when we set sail, the better- For many reasons~

So, not only am I in the perfect position to have a child & raise him or her as a single momma as I was pretty much betting I'd end up having to do anyway... I've also found someone that I really care about who is willing to be the father of my child.. A lot of the reason I haven't been on all month is because I've been spending my time with him and loving every single moment of it~ :3 He's a single father himself and loves his child more than anything. That's part of what attracted me to him- He's also the first man to treat me with the kind of love, respect, and kindness I have always longed for. He's everything I've been looking for in a man really... & he supports me in my dreams more than anything. So I really am in the best position now for having my baby~

Realistically & logically, it really does make a lot more sense to stay where I'm at and go ahead & have my child. Most of my crew is nowhere near ready to go off adventuring with me anyway. Especially, if I were to rush off in 6-8 months! I would most likely end up going alone or with just one or two of the crew with me.. and that's not what I want. I want us all together throughout all our adventures. I can still go off backpacking & practicing survival skills after having a child. I'd just have to make them shorter, simpler trips. Also, my dream was to have my child with me as I sailed around the world, so having my child now rather than later wouldn't make much of a difference other than my child being a bit older when we finally hit the open seas; which to me is a better idea because they'll be stronger & will be better able to handle the stresses of sailing then.

I've got a great job, great healthcare, great benefits, and even retirement savings that'll only grow the longer I stay in. I've a roof over my head and wonderful friends. My relationship with my family has even greatly improved since coming here. Plus, having my baby now affects almost nothing in the overall scheme of things~ In fact, having my baby now seems much smarter to me actually. I'm younger. I'm the healthiest and in the best shape I've ever been. I'm able to put away a decent amount of money each month with the paycheck I currently get, so.. yeah- If I'm going to have a baby, now's probably the best time I'll ever get~

Besides- I've no guarantees that I'll get to live to be 40 anyway... anything could happen in the future, so there's no time like the present- & if having a baby, being a mother, is the one thing I long for most (which it really & truly is)... then what the heck am I waiting for? I sit here day after day telling others to live their dreams, but keep pushing mine off into the future like an idiot! So there you have it~ I've decided that I wish to have my baby now instead of waiting until later. This gives my crew more time to get their lives in order to come join me on our grand adventure. It'll also bring me far more joy & happiness than anything else in this universe! Now I just gotta talk to the man I affectionately call my donor daddy and see if he is still willing... Otherwise, I guess it's back to looking for a donor from the sperm bank- 

Either way- I've decided that I'm having my baby- & Now! Not later. I feel it's for the best in the long run and overall scheme of things~ ^_^

Remember ya'll... LIVE YOUR DREAMS!

-Aria D Gaia

Tuesday, August 4, 2015

Moving Forward- :)

With the recent shift, I am now moving forward with my vision for Dream Ship- I've just completed my first patch for my first red vest. As soon as it's dry, I shall be sewing it onto the back of my summer vest so that next week I can get out on my days off and start cleaning up all the garbage around town. It's frankly been making me quite irritated and angry to see all the garbage around our tiny little town, so I'm going to start cleaning it up. I've got me a lightweight hamper for carrying a garbage bag for putting the trash into it and next week I'll be picking up a "picker".. "grabber".. O.o... Whatever that darn thingy is called for picking up garbage. XP This way I can pick up a whole lot more without wearing myself out. I'll dress nice, wear my vest, don my iPod, & spend a few hours picking up the garbage along the sides of the street. :)

Once I've completed my Dragon Con & Halloween costumes for this year, I'll get back to working on my gypsy tent. It's about 30% completed at this point and shouldn't take me too long to finish it. Sewing is easy~ It's just time consuming since I do everything by hand. XD However, with the fall coming and the camping trip I'm planning for January, I need to finish it asap that way I can take it camping- Thus, I'll be using all my spare time to finish my sewing projects over the next few months. ;) 

Streamlining and simplifying things has certainly lifted a heavy load off my shoulders. ^_^ I feel more focused & able to handle everything I'm trying to accomplish. My wish is to repay TVXQ for saving me by going out and making the world around me a better place. They gave me love, hope, & self-confidence. They helped me to love & believe in myself for the first time in my life, so I wish to go out and share that gift with others. I want to help people get back up on their feet & dust themselves off, just as TVXQ helped me. I want to fill the world with hope & love, just as they filled my heart with hope & love. I wish to give other Dreamers the same kind of love & support that they have given me. They probably don't even know I exist... but that's ok~ I wish to share the gift they have given me, because I can think of no better way to repay their kindness.

Some people may think that a single word, action, or song can't make any kind of a difference in someone's life, especially in the life of a complete stranger, but it can. They may not have written the song 'Love in the Ice', but they sang Ryoji Sonoda's lyrics with such emotion, love, & devotion that it broke through all the darkness that had surrounded me & kept me buried my whole life. It reached me deep down in the deepest, darkest pits of hell & opened my eyes as well as my heart. It was as if 5 angels had reached out their hands within a piercing ray of light only to take hold of mine and lift me up to see the world filled with hope & love. Never underestimate the kind of difference you can make in another person's life even with the smallest act of kindness or love..

I have always wanted to make the world a better place~ However, I felt defeated & lost for so long that I had given up. Now I know that I can make a difference & I am no longer lost. I WILL make this world a better place! Just as they made my world a better place.. I wish to make this world a better place for all those around me as best I can. I am not perfect- I have my demons just as everyone else does. However, I refuse to let that define me. I want to leave my mark on this world & I want that mark to be a positive, uplifting, & hopeful one. ♡


-Aria D Gaia

Monday, August 3, 2015

From now on-

With the reorganization of this blog, I have separated my art business from my private venture of social change. From now on I will be using this blog as a public record of my thoughts, insights, & actions throughout my travels. It will act as my digital journal and I will record all my exploits here. Anyone who wishes to follow along may do so. In fact, you can even get email updates if you like. :) Simply fill out the email subscription on the side of this page.


-Aria D Gaia

Dream Ship Flag!

Dream Ship now has a flag! :D

If you see this flag, know that the person flying it is a person who is willing to help out his or her fellow man or woman or even animal friend as best they can. We are the vehicles of positive change that each of us wishes to see in the world around us. My nakama & I will be wearing red vests with this flag emblazoned on the back whenever & wherever we are working to make the world a better place. Wish to join the movement? Feel free to make your own red vest or flag~ Or you can contact me at & I can make one for you. :)


-Aria D Gaia

Complete Reorganization-

I have come to realize that what I was trying to do with Dream Ship has become way too complicated and stressful. Thus, I have made the decision to simplify things and make Dream Ship more of a social movement to inspire others to live their dreams and make the world around them a better place. I will be updating my blog & Facebook pages to reflect this. I wish for Dream Ship to be something that others decide for themselves if they wish to be apart of it. I wish for it to grow and expand on its own without me having to force things to happen. I want Dream Ship to be a movement among the people of the world to spread joy, happiness, & well-being where people get up to live their dreams without fear of what others might think of them. I envision a world where everyone works together, helps each other, & supports each other as each person grows to become the person they were meant to be. I envision a world where people strive to be happy in their own way without causing strife or pain to others. Sure, we'll always have our issues and disagreements.. but do we really need to fight and kill each other over them? Some might see me as a hopeless optimistic, but I disagree. I KNOW we can be so much more than this! I see it every day through all the small acts of kindness I see around me and on the web. We could be so much more if we all just tried. I know there are thousands out there who wish to see the world become a better place for us all.. and the only way to make it happen is for each of us to stand up to make it happen ourselves, through our own actions, our own words. We can do this! I KNOW we can! :)

Come on everyone! :D


-Aria D Gaia

P.S. You will notice that all art & business related items have been removed from Dream Ship- If you have an interest in my art, please seek me out on Facebook through my artist page: