Tuesday, November 17, 2015


I fear my dreams of sailing around the world have been put to an end.... :'(

The darkness of the world now has grown far too thick & dangerous.... I cannot guarantee the safety of my nakama, my crew, my friends.... 

The Great Spirit is now calling me to a greater end- Pulling me towards a path that I have been hesitant to follow & blocked off from for most of my life, but now have access to through a very good friend. 

I cannot say for sure that I must absolutely abandon my dream to sail around the world & bring light to those who need it... However, I fear now that the current state of things the world over will prevent it. I fear that World War III is upon us, my dear friends..... TT^TT.......... & that there is little to nothing we can do to stop it-

I shall continue to save, work, & hope for the best... that this dark cloud passes swiftly & that things brighten after its passing. However, there is now another path I must follow in order to survive what I fear to be coming. I pray for the world & all my brothers & sisters of every race, creed, & clan....

May this darkness pass over us & our hearts lead us to a brighter end-


-Aria D Gaia

Thursday, October 29, 2015

An Excellent Tip! :D

I was at work today, discussing my dreams of sailing around the world, exploring, helping people, & extending the American classroom to include the wide open world through video & online classes with a teacher who is retiring & she gave me the most EXCELLENT tip! :D

She told me to contact National Geographic & speak with them about my plans- She said that they sponsor people all the time to do this sort of stuff & that they may very well be interested in adding me & my crew to their explorer roster! KYA!!! XD 

When I went on further to explain my plans for the building of our custom ship & how it's going to be designed to be completely green... i.e. completely fossil fuel free... she was even more insistent that I contact them, saying that something like that would be completely up their alley! :D

OMG! OMG! OMG!!!! :D I am SO excited right now! The possibilities with something like that are literally ENDLESS!!! XD If National Geographic were to take me on as one of their explorers, I would have a full time job doing EXACTLY what I love!! <3 

I am SOOOOO looking into this! :D As soon as I'm a bit more solid on the planning, I'm going to give them a call! XD This could be EPIC!!! \(>o<)/


-Aria D Gaia

Monday, October 26, 2015

Recap of recent developments~

So! As you know, I have had a lot of upheaval happening in my life recently as far as my health & dreams are concerned. However, I'm not giving up- I'm going back to my 10 year Park Ranger plan where I will work for the park service until I am ready to retire & set sail. This will give me the money I need to accomplish my dreams as well as the security I need as far as healthcare is concerned for both me and my future child.

I will be purchasing land in Ocean View, Hawai'i within the next year and I can't be more excited! I just learned that Ocean View is ranked the second most dangerous area to live on the main island, second only to living on the actual volcano summits of Mauna Loa & Kilauea. This just makes me wish to live there even more! :D  It'll take me a year to purchase the property then another 6 months to a year to save up for the move. Once there, I shall get to work building myself a tiny trailer home so that if & when another lava flow heads towards the property, I'll be able to remove the house & not lose anything. 

Some of my crew & friends wish to move to Hawai'i with me, so hopefully I won't have to go it alone there. However, I will if I must and prosper just the same. :) The Hawaiian Volcano National Park staff responded to my email the other day saying that they look forward to having me there on the island working with them at the park. Of course, there aren't any job openings (& there haven't been in a looooong while), so I'll have to start off as a volunteer there, but if that's what it takes to get my foot in the door, I will do it! Working at a volcano park has been my dream as a geologist & park ranger ever since I graduated from FSU! If I absolutely MUST work, I might as well work at something I enjoy & volcanoes are amazing! :D

I'm also considering starting up my own little shop where I might sell my upcycled clothing & accessories~ :) I think I'll call it "Gaia's Dream Shop" & I'll even teach sewing classes to adults & children. If my friend comes with me & adds her crochet work to the inventory at the shop then I may consider a different name that represents the both of us. Then I'll let her run the shop when I take off to sail around the world. ^_^

We'll see how things work out, but right now things are good~ :)


-Aria D Gaia

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

My health & worries..

With the results of today's tilt table test still fresh in my mind.. I am beginning to realize that my health is not as good as I thought it was. There's a high probability that once all the exams & tests are done that the cardiologist will give me a prescription to take daily in order to regulate my heart. You see, I have a heart condition known as NeuroCardioGenic Syncope, or Syncopy for short... & that may not be all that's wrong with my heart.. :/

What my condition basically entails is that the signals my nerves send to my heart when I am under stress get jumbled & my heart doesn't know what to do, thus causing it to do the opposite of what it should do. For example, when a person gets too dehydrated their blood pressure drops. This is when your nerves are supposed to tell your heart to beat faster in order to regulate your blood pressure and keep up the optimum blood flow throughout your body. Well...? My heart doesn't do that. 

When I get too dehydrated or stressed causing my blood pressure to drop the electrical signals to my heart telling it to beat faster get jumbled.. causing my heart to get confused which then causes it to slow down dropping my heart rate & blood pressure to rock bottom lows within seconds. This in turn causes me to  first get dizzy, then to black out & collapse if I don't stop & rest immediately. If it's bad enough.. I could go into cardiac arrest. This is why I'm not allowed to have caffeine or alcohol. Too much caffeine & I can have a heart attack. Too much alcohol & I can go into cardiac arrest.

Basically, My heart doesn't know how to regulate itself thanks to faulty wiring- :(

It's something I was born with, so I've lived with it my whole life. However, it's not a condition that is constant. Some days I'm totally fine & could practically run a marathon~ Other days.. I can hardly get out of bed without the whole world spinning around my head. On my good days, I'm all gung ho & ready to take on the world. On my not-so-good days, I worry that my health won't allow me to accomplish my dreams..

If I am given medication by my new cardiologist..... I may seriously have to reconsider my sailing venture. I've gone 8 years without meds, but the heat this past summer with me working hard outside all day long as a park ranger really took it's toll on me. I am beginning to fear what might happen on the ship if we're caught out in a storm & my heart condition suddenly kicks in. Who will take care of my child? Who will take care of my crew? If I'm taken down by my condition, who will lead them & watch over them? What will happen to them..& to me?

As much as I long for adventure & to travel, the lives on my future child & my crew are far more important to me. If something were to happen to me... what would happen to them....? :'(

So now.. Now I'm wondering if I might have to reconsider how I go about accomplishing my sailing venture. Before I wanted to cut ties with everything & just live self-sufficient & free upon the sea with no rules other than my own. Now..? If my health requires that I must take medication in order to remain stable & healthy, then I will have to either find a way to keep up with my health insurance, thus requiring a job or lots of money... or I will have to find a natural alternative for the medicine. As long as I take things easy & go at my own pace, I'm fine without meds- :) Well.. For the most part anyway~

I will also have to make sure that I have a 2nd in command on the ship that will be able to take over if anything should happen to me. Someone who will watch over my future child & crew as if they were family as I would. With several of my crew mates now no longer sure that they will be joining me on my venture, that position is now in question.. 

*heavy sigh* ......................... :(

I'm at a loss..... :'( I refuse to give up my dreams! However... my dreams may need to evolve into something more modern than I had originally intended. I was hoping to escape the current standards of living & bring back the simpler days of old sailing upon the sea, just using more modern technology for energy & fresh food on board. Now though.. I may have to do something a bit different....

That's ok though~ :) As long as I can become a mother & travel the world helping people, I don't care how I go about it. If I have to split my sailing adventure into shorter legs only spending a few months at sea rather than whole years at a time, then so be it~ If that's what it takes to make my dreams come true, then that's just what I'll do! :D I've decided that I shall try to specialize as an artist. Right now I dabble in all forms of art, but that makes it hard for me to gain greater talent in any one form. I absolutely LOVE upcycling! <3 So that's what I'll focus on~ ;)

Upcycling old things into new doesn't limit me on what I can make. I like that- :) It only limits what materials I use to create my pieces. The things I like to make most are unique dresses & accessories~ :3 So my upcycling work will focus on hand-made items for use or wear. ^_^ I consider stuffed toys accessories as well, so I'll still be making bears, bunnies, & more for the kids~ ;) Basically, all these things require sewing & I sew everything by hand. Jewelry making will be the only thing that won't require sewing, but I'll continue doing that as well. :)

Recently, I've decided to purchase land in Hawai'i~ ^_^ I've found perfect barren lava rock property there that I can easily afford to purchase within a year, so I'm going to do so. I see it as an investment~ ;) Also, it'll put me in the Pacific which is where I wish my home port to be for when I take to the sea. Not only that, Hawai'i is by far my most favorite state! I've lived there for a year when I was a child & I've yet to find a place better- :3 Once there, I will look at starting up my own little art studio where I will sell my creations. :) I may have even found a business partner who has already expressed interest in moving to Hawai'i with me~ <3

I also wish to start writing~ I've been a daydreamer my whole entire life & I can create the most wonderful worlds & epic stories! I just haven't been able to get myself to focus on just one story long enough to actually see it through.. so I'll have to work on that. :3 If I can write a good book & become a decent author, I can use that as a source of income as well. I've also made all kinds of retirement plans, including a 1/2 acre farm & hosting hot air balloon tours from my own back yard with a balloon I shall build myself! XD

So even though my current health situation has me a little worried about how to go about my future endeavors, I still have a lot of ideas, hopes, & aspirations. I will find a way to make it all happen! I know I will! :D I've done everything else I've set my mind to & no stupid genetic heart condition is going to stop me now or ever! ;) Dream Ship WILL happen & the D.S. Sunny Freedom WILL sail! & when I retire? I shall retire to the D.S. Mini Merry & the D.S. Sky Rider, my smaller private sailing vessel & my future hot air balloon~ ^_^


-Aria D Gaia

Saturday, October 10, 2015

Things are looking up~ :)

At the moment, I am attending to my overall health. However, once I have restored myself to full health & had my heart condition thoroughly diagnosed, I will then be able to get back to planning my first of many mini survival trips~ ^_^ Since I've decided to continue working as a park ranger in order to save money & support my future child, the Hike America trip shall be broken up into pieces and stretched over my future camping trips using my vacation time from work. :) 

I shall pick several different locations & hiking trails in which to explore, one location per vacation. Each trip will be a mini survival trip with me hunting, fishing, & foraging for whatever food I need at each location I visit. Hopefully, some of my crew will be able to join me on these trips. I'll even bring my child on them~ Unless, of course, Grandma wishes to spoil her grandchild while I'm away & volunteers to watch over him or her. :P

Once I've finished paying any medical bills I may accrue over the next two months, I shall begin saving for a piece of land in Hawaii & a car. I shall also start taking the ballroom dancing classes I have always longed to take. I've even considering taking another college course in the spring~ :) If I were to get a Masters in Volcanology, then I could secure a position at the volcano observatory in Hawaii or at least be a ranger at their national park. ^_^

Even though the man I had hoped would be willing to help me have a child has decided that he would rather not, it doesn't change a thing. I shall simply visit the sperm bank in Ocala & discuss with them what measures would be best for me to safely conceive & bear my future child. Who says a woman needs a man in order to have a child? All a woman needs is sperm & good solid conviction to be a rocking, awesome single mom! ;)

So even though I am a little sad that the man I've fallen for has decided that he doesn't want to be a bigger part of my life.. All things consider, my life is going quite well~ ^_^ I'm slowly becoming an early bird & it brings me joy to watch the sun rise each morning. We'll soon be switching to a 10-hr day, 4 days a week at work with 3 days off and a set schedule each week, so I'll be able to get out more. Plus, I'll be able to save up enough money to buy the land I want by the end of 2016~ :D

I'm still going to retire between the age of 40 to 45 & then sail around the world helping others. I'll soon be using my 3 days of each week to do volunteer work. Also, I've been preparing both myself & my home for my future child. So.. Yes- Things are certainly looking up! ^_^


-Aria D Gaia

Friday, September 25, 2015

Lesson Learned..

Lately, I've been pushing myself super hard & constantly on the go, go, go. I've been traveling to see family or entertaining family at home. Been running all over to spend time with friends & loved ones. At work, I've been pushing myself to do more & more, despite the heat and my slowly failing health.. Now I'm sick. I nearly pushed myself to the point of developing Pneumonia.. & it's taught me something...

I need to slow down-

I'm happiest going at my own pace which is leisurely & allowing myself to absorb the wonder of life & the world around me. When I force myself to go, go, go at the speed of the rest of this fast paced world, I wind up becoming so stressed out that I get sick..... & for some reason it always seems to happen at the end of Summer when the season turns to Autumn once more.. :/ Weird- Anyway!

Sitting here, sick at home, I've been reviewing my vision for my dreams: to be a mother; to sail the world; to live life self-sufficiently as a hunter, gatherer, farmer; to make a difference in the world around me... & all of them.. ALL of them! I have always envisioned accomplishing at my usual slow, leisurely pace. Life is NOT a race! No matter how hard I push myself, nothing's going to get accomplished any faster & I'll only succeed in stressing myself out & making myself sick in the process. That is NOT what I want-

I've come to realize that I have another wish intertwined within my dreams... & that is to live my life happily, to experience all I can, & to see all the wonder & magic in life that exists all around. If I'm always on the run, how am I ever to see all that? I can't- Running around like everyone else does here in America causes me to miss the little things.. the tiny things.... The kinds of things one can only see when they are completely absorbed in the moment. 

Like... the little butterfly that flutters across my path.. or the new blossoming flowers that weren't there the day before.. the little girl smiling & laughing as she shows her mom her new toy.. or the couple picking on each other as they browse through the store.. the feel of the cool breeze across my skin & through my hair.. or the feel of the rain as it falls upon me & all around.. the sound of birds singing or waves crashing upon the shore.. It is those tiny little things that bring my life joy~ :3

It is for this reason that I refuse to work a 2nd job ever again, even though I know for a fact that it would allow me to save up a lot more money a lot faster. It is why I constantly like to get away from this fast paced world and sit quietly among nature or people watch here in town. Constantly being on the run like most people are these days, is for me a one way ticket to living a life stressed out, sick, & exhausted. I need my slow, leisurely pace & time to myself among nature in order to stay healthy & happy~

So- From now on.. I refuse to overexert myself as I have been this past summer. I'm going to work at MY pace. NOT someone else's- I will live each & every one of my dreams & fulfill all of my wishes in my way & not worry about what anyone else thinks or says about my pace or way of life. I may not seem like an overachiever at work, but I also won't be a slacker. I'll do my part and contribute to the park in my own way. :) No more trying to live up to everyone else's standards- I'm going to live by MINE! ;)


-Aria D Gaia

Wednesday, September 16, 2015

Ugghhh... :(

This past week or so has been killer on the spirit.... :( But also quite healing as well~ :)

I do not wish to go into too much detail, but basically some of my old demons & insecurities decided to rear their ugly heads which stressed me out and made me angry... Then things got super stressful at work on top of it, making things even more irritating- :'( However- Things are much better now~ :)

I've basically gone through a mini transformation both mentally & spiritually over the past week & a half. Nothing's changed as far as my dreams are concerned, they've only become more embellished & refined. ;) I'm now in a better & healthier place mentally & spiritually, so I'll be able to tackle things more resolutely than I would have before. :) I've come to realize... that I truly am loved~ :3 It's a new feeling for me & every time I think about it I get teary-eyed. I've spent most of my life believing that no one loved me & that I never should have been born, but since finding my real father, I have come to find that I am loved by him more than I ever thought possible. It's really opened my eyes. I also now have people around me in this tiny little town that care & show it in a myriad of different ways. I never had that before either.

Now I've had many good friends over the recent past few years that have stuck by me, who I know care & I love them dearly. However, I never really felt truly loved at my core until just recently. My biggest & strongest pain was that my parents never really loved me and only saw me as a burden.. I firmly believed that for over 25 years. However, over the past 6 years (since finding my real father especially), I have slowly come to see that my parents DO love me. My mother may not show it in the obvious ways or in ways that I would have recognized in the past, but I have begun to recognize her ways of showing love recently & it has been a boon to me. I've even come to recognize my step-family's ways & that has brought me joy as well.

Never having my real father in my life was very painful and confusing for me growing up, but now that I've found him & he's in my life now.. everything is different~ <3 My real father is everything I had ever wanted in a father & he's the kind of loving parent I had always longed for, so having him in my life now & knowing he's MINE by blood has made me so proud & happy to be his child~ As well as to be alive. :) I'm even finding love with the man I've been seeing lately; the one I recently called my "donor daddy".. all that is still up in the air, but it's ok~ I've no wish to rush things- ;) Our lives at the moment are going in two different directions, so we've decided to keep things simple & just be really good friends~ But even that has become so very fulfilling for me. :3

& above all I am learning that even though Life isn't going perfectly like I would like to sometimes force it to be.. it's still the most incredible journey~ :D & if I were to simply let go of the control & enjoy things, Life becomes all the more beautiful & enchanting~ ^_^

Oh! I've decided to purchase a piece of land in my dream state of Hawaii! :D I've no plans of moving there until after my grand adventure as of yet, but I wish to have a place I can retire to & not have to worry about finding a place to call home anymore. I've even begun to envision the most wonderful fantasy style home that I'd like to build there~ The land I'm considering is nothing but lava rock with absolutely no vegetation in sight, but that means I've got the PERFECT building material right there on the land provided for me for free by Mother Nature herself! XD

I'm envisioning a hobbit style home with the lava rock built up into a small, low hill.. kinda like the EarthShip homes you see online. Then I wish to build a lava rock sculpture of a grand tree, cover it with native flowering vines so that it looks alive, then build an elf-like light-weight tree house among it's branches! :D KYA!! Simply MAGICAL sounding, isn't it!? XD Of course.. it'll take forever to build it all, but I feel it'll be the perfect retirement project~ ^_^ & while I'm working on all that I'll live in a small shack with solar panels on the roof, living an entirely self-sufficient lifestyle with a 1/2 acre farm with a small green house, pygmy goats, & a puppy dog. <3

America is my home~ She's not perfect & she infuriates me at times, but this is where I was born... & it's everything I know. It pains me to know that the American reputation in some places is a nasty one.. but I can only do my best to be a good human being in order to show how that reputation is no reflection of every American. I seriously hate stereotypes... >:( But the only way to combat them is to be a living example of just how wrong they are. ;)

Just like how some people believe red-heads are cold-hearted & cruel mean little witches.. Well..? Get to know me & you'll find one of the kindest & warm-hearted women around. :) Sure- I CAN be cold.. even mean at times... but I never take pleasure in it. I never like hurting others. I only get that way towards people who truly are witches & monsters. Like bullies- I DO NOT put up with bullies! I've been bullied my entire life & I finally had enough of it when I was 17. I decided to finally get up & take a stand against it. Now I defend anyone & everyone within reach against bullies. The problem is that sometimes the only way to stop a bully is to get mean. Sometimes they just never had anyone show them how their actions hurt others. I put bullies in their place in a respectful, but strong way- I don't think what I do is mean, but I have been told that I can be extremely scary when I get angry & speak out against a bully. *shrugs* I guess it's all in how I carry myself when I get angry.. lol~ Oh well- Whatever it is, it works. The bullies stop and I never see them bully another person ever again. :)

I also never hold a grudge~ ;) That's key in teaching young ones not to bully. I taught English in S. Korea for 2 years & had to deal with a teenage bully who would bully even the teachers, treating the other children (some half her age) so badly they'd be in tears. Well- One day I had had enough. The boss was out for the day & since everyone else was too scared of her parents getting angry to put her in her place.. I did- She had made a little girl cry by flicking her off, harassing her, calling her all kinds of nasty names, and kicking her out of the movie room where all the other kids were watching a movie in English. When my Korean co-teacher told me what had happened, I marched right up to the classroom and said, "YOU! OUT! NOW!" The bully sat there flabbergasted and tried to deny everything, but I looked at her pointedly and said, "Dorothy-teacher told me EXACTLY what you did! Get downstairs! NOW! You DO NOT treat the other kids like that!" Then I marched her 13-yr-old little behind downstairs. After that, I took the hand of the 8-yr-old she had bullied and walked up her up to the movie room, talked with her kindly, & sat with her until she had stopped crying & was laughing at the movie. From then on, the 13-yr-old never bullied another soul at the school & she began treating all of us with respect. Once I saw that, I complimented her, spoke with her gently, helped her with her English more when she had questions, & even rewarded her for her good grammar & manners~ :) Once she saw that she would not be treated harshly if she treated others with respect, she changed. It was a total transformation and all it took was a firm hand with absolutely no tolerance for disrespect followed by a gentle hand of forgiveness & kindness. ;)

Anyway... O.o.... I've completely lost track of where I was going with this post, but.. oh well- LOL! XD I just wished to write to everyone and let you know that all is well here and that things are looking up. In just a month or two, once things cool down a bit here, I'll be getting to work on cleaning up the tiny little town where I live & getting my social movement.. well.. MOVING! XD I'll post pictures & stories of everything going on here in regards to Dream Ship~ :D So please look forward to them! ^_^

& as always~ LIVE YOUR DREAMS! ;)

-Aria D Gaia

Saturday, August 29, 2015

Hey everyone~

Sorry for the long absence, but I've had a lot going on and a lot on my mind as of late. You see, something happened to me a few weeks back that made me question everything I've had planned and all my priorities. I thought I had become pregnant~ & for that first week, I was so happy & thrilled I was literally on Cloud 9. So high up was my heart, mind, & soul that I refused to believe it when the take home tests kept telling me I wasn't... until the irrefutable truth finally set in and made itself known. Learning that I was NOT pregnant was probably the most heart wrenching thing I've experienced in a long time. I cried my heart out- But it made me realize something...

It made me realize that I want to have a child more than anything else in this universe. Far more than anything else I have thus far wished to have. I've always longed to have a child and I've spoken of it often. However, I have always been waiting & waiting for the right guy to come along.. and now I've waited 16 YEARS & yet Mr. Right still eludes me. I just keep getting older and older... and life's not going to wait forever- Eventually, it'll be too late to have a child and I've come to see that being told that I can't have a child is probably my #1 greatest fear. So.. despite the disappointment I've had to endure the past week.. I'm glad it all happened, because it made me rethink things & realize that I need to reorganize my priorities at bit.

It doesn't affect my overall plan at all- ;) I still plan to retire at 40 and set sail around the world on the D.S. Sunny Freedom that I have yet to build. I will still do everything I can to make the world a better place for all those around me. I will also still go on my backpacking trip across the country. I am still going to have a child before I turn 35. The only thing it's changing is the order in which I wish to accomplish all these things~

Thinking about things realistically & logically.. I'm probably in the absolute BEST position to have my child NOW. I've got a wonderful job which pays well and has excellent health benefits. I'm settled in a quaint little town that is perfectly safe for small children to grow up in. There's even a daycare center that just opened up down the street from my place. I've even found a brand new art co-op just the other day that is willing to sell my art on commission. Things are going extremely well for me right now and I've even been able to save up a decent amount of money for my future ship in the form of a 401k through work. If I stay on with the FPS for 4 more years, I'll be a vested employee and earn even more benefits towards my early retirement. So if I'm looking to raise a child, I'm in the best position NOW to do so!

If I were to go ahead with my previous plan of resigning in 6-8 months to do my backpacking trip.. there would be absolutely no guarantee that I'd be able to find such a nice job again; much less find one quickly. I'd be putting not only my health & my child's health at risk, but I'd be putting all of my future plans at risk by going off somewhere else, only to find that I can't find a decent job or can only find a job without the nice benefits. I may not be able to afford to have my child and still save up for everything I desire to accomplish. If I stay here, I'll have no problems in doing so- Also, if I were to have my child now, my child would be 8 or 9 years old when I set sail instead of only 4 or 5.. & frankly? The older my child is when we set sail, the better- For many reasons~

So, not only am I in the perfect position to have a child & raise him or her as a single momma as I was pretty much betting I'd end up having to do anyway... I've also found someone that I really care about who is willing to be the father of my child.. A lot of the reason I haven't been on all month is because I've been spending my time with him and loving every single moment of it~ :3 He's a single father himself and loves his child more than anything. That's part of what attracted me to him- He's also the first man to treat me with the kind of love, respect, and kindness I have always longed for. He's everything I've been looking for in a man really... & he supports me in my dreams more than anything. So I really am in the best position now for having my baby~

Realistically & logically, it really does make a lot more sense to stay where I'm at and go ahead & have my child. Most of my crew is nowhere near ready to go off adventuring with me anyway. Especially, if I were to rush off in 6-8 months! I would most likely end up going alone or with just one or two of the crew with me.. and that's not what I want. I want us all together throughout all our adventures. I can still go off backpacking & practicing survival skills after having a child. I'd just have to make them shorter, simpler trips. Also, my dream was to have my child with me as I sailed around the world, so having my child now rather than later wouldn't make much of a difference other than my child being a bit older when we finally hit the open seas; which to me is a better idea because they'll be stronger & will be better able to handle the stresses of sailing then.

I've got a great job, great healthcare, great benefits, and even retirement savings that'll only grow the longer I stay in. I've a roof over my head and wonderful friends. My relationship with my family has even greatly improved since coming here. Plus, having my baby now affects almost nothing in the overall scheme of things~ In fact, having my baby now seems much smarter to me actually. I'm younger. I'm the healthiest and in the best shape I've ever been. I'm able to put away a decent amount of money each month with the paycheck I currently get, so.. yeah- If I'm going to have a baby, now's probably the best time I'll ever get~

Besides- I've no guarantees that I'll get to live to be 40 anyway... anything could happen in the future, so there's no time like the present- & if having a baby, being a mother, is the one thing I long for most (which it really & truly is)... then what the heck am I waiting for? I sit here day after day telling others to live their dreams, but keep pushing mine off into the future like an idiot! So there you have it~ I've decided that I wish to have my baby now instead of waiting until later. This gives my crew more time to get their lives in order to come join me on our grand adventure. It'll also bring me far more joy & happiness than anything else in this universe! Now I just gotta talk to the man I affectionately call my donor daddy and see if he is still willing... Otherwise, I guess it's back to looking for a donor from the sperm bank- 

Either way- I've decided that I'm having my baby- & Now! Not later. I feel it's for the best in the long run and overall scheme of things~ ^_^

Remember ya'll... LIVE YOUR DREAMS!

-Aria D Gaia